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Need answers, you might be able to provide...

Dear "whoever you are"...
From the age of 15, i have been having experiences beyond what would be called "normal" in this world. These experiences stretch beyond this reality and have become very hard to bear within the last 6 years. I am not talking about anything that you could read or hear anywhere.
The event that triggered all this was a short coma.
I have been seeking the truth for the past 20 years, read the whole Nag Hammadi Lib., reserached the world's mythology, all available info about secret societies, conspiracies, anything that could give me a clue why me.
I am not making up any stories to get among anyone. Actually, my only desire is to have finally peace of mind, which is with all this experience nearly impossible. I am sorry for no details because it could be read by "eyes".

More over, still i have this unexplainable urge to reserach why, even if i am trying to accept this "reality" very hard, and not to dig any further. The last one lead me to the genealogy.
I have found something which i find very strange, as i partially understand symbolism, and possibly could explain my why. I just need to know the truth because living in this is worse than hell or how to call it.
I have asked to be registered at your website. I am not seeking a membership, but if you think, you could help me, my email is there.

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At increadible speed from the brightest Light, throught the worlds beyond one's imagination, constantly chased, very unhappy being trapped in a place, seeing beyong things but with wings tied up, knowing there is a true home where all exists in absolute love and harmony that does not perish..