Depersonalization Forum

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Depersonalization Forum
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Questioning

Something I tend to do a lot is ask myself a lot of questions like:
"Have I actually always felt this way, and just didn't notice until now?"
"Do I really have DP, or am I just imagining it?"
I also bring up memories and wonder, "Did I feel dream-like then?"
I think about things I said/felt/thought in the past and wonder, "What does that mean? Why did I say/feel/think that?"

What's with all this questioning!? Any ideas?

Re: Questioning

Depersonalization is somewhat ironic in that it involves a feeling of no-self or lost-selt, while it turn focuses on the self, or the problem within it that won't go away. You felt one way before, now you feel different. So you spend all your time analyzing what went wrong and trying to recapture the feelings of normalcy that you once tookl for granted. Even though DP has been linked to obsessiveness in many patients, it does not seem to respond well to anti-obsessive meds, like prozac. This, I am convinced, it because it is a different kind of obsession. When you don't feel normal, it's quite natural to obsess about what went wrong and why you feel the way you do. Hence, this kind of obsessiveness, over-thinking, over analyzing etc. becomes an integral part of the overal DPD experience. This is probably what you are going through.

Re: Re: Questioning

Thank you.
Some of my thoughts/feelings/behaviours throughout the years seem to line up with DPD. However, I'm not sure if that means I have DPD or not.

Re: Re: Re: Questioning

Is there any way to stop all this over-analyzing? I feel like I am making everything a lot more complicated than it needs to be.

Re: Re: Questioning

But is that to say that the obsessive rumination perpetuates and precipitates the condition? I remember with the onset of DP for me it would be like, "wow that was a weird sensation I had the other day, what the hell was that?" and before I could stop it, I was dp'd.

However after a moment of distraction by a familiar face or situation, I was able to forget about it and come out of the state.

But as time progressed, the worry progressed, the thought progressed, and so did the feeling. Now I've been chronically DP'd for about a year now and am very confused and frusterated.

I guess what I'm saying is, if I could just know for sure that the rumination is whats precipitating it, I could stop. But I don't want to waste energy and time trying to not think about it when the DP experience might be completely out of our concious control, whether we obsess on it or not.

Re: Re: Re: Questioning

I absolutely, 100% believe that ruminating worsens the condition. I have found that if I can make myself stop doing that and somewhat try to ignore the DP symptoms, I feel much better, and it almost makes it go away for periods of time. If I become very anxious or obsess, it becomes worse again. If you look in the DSM-IV (psychological diagnostic manual), DP is actually a symptom of anxiety disorders, so they are definately related.