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Limericks

A game I picked up on another site that might raise you lot out of this state of drunken lethargy. Someone starts the first line of a limerick which the next poster copies and adds a new line. Whoever adds the last line starts a new limerick. So I'll start it off...

At risk of crucifixion by Gerry

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At risk of crucifixion by Gerry
Ron Taylors not feeling so merry

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At risk of crucifixion by Gerry
Ron Taylors not feeling so merry
It's probably 'cos

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At risk of crucifixion by Gerry
Ron Taylors not feeling so merry
It's probably 'cos
He don't give a toss

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He dont fancy his **** felt by Jerry

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You start the next one WIllie.

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There once was a lad called Nobby
who had a rather large freckle on his bobby

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But the doctors all nodded
after they probed and they prodded
Saying we think it is part of a jobbie !!!

We all know how you get that on the end of your wullie, dont we Rod ¬¬¬¬

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There once was a gaggle of siggies
Who met every year when they were civvies

They all craved for Blackpool
But Gerd did want to

Cause they already have too many diddies

Gerd xx

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Thats should read

Gerd didnt want to......

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Oh no, Jerry, as they say on the quiz shows, your first answer is the only one acceptable. So..... see you in Blackpool!!

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Gerd is finally going to Blackpool

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Gerd is finally going to Blackpool

I'm told he went to a crack school.

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Gerd is finally going to Blackpool

I'm told he went to a crack school

He starts at the gym

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Gerd is finally going to Blackpool

I'm told he went to a crack school

He starts at the gym

He asks "Is it in"?

Cos he's been playing muffin the mule

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Ah Blackpool, the place is renowned
As somewhere to let your hair down

But some siggies like Ron
Whose locks have long gone

Can join the slapheads tour around town !!!

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The reunion in Blackpool next year
is selling like hotcakes I hear

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The reunion in Blackpool next year

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The reunion in Blackpool next year
is selling like hotcakes I hear
The only thing is, the hotel is full

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The reunion in Blackpool next year
is selling like hotcakes I hear
The only thing is, the hotel is full
so don't havta listen to Jerry's bull
cos we're all here for the beer

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as the last one was finished by taylor

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as the last one was finished by taylor
though the metre was a bit of a failure

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as the last one was finished by taylor
though the metre was a bit of a failure
and he goes on too long

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as the last one was finished by taylor
though the metre was a bit of a failure
and he goes on too long
I had to drink to be strong
cos it's a long way from blackpool to australia

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It's got so bloody quiet of late

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It's got so bloody quiet of late
have you all got too much on your plate?

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It's got so bloody quiet of late
have you all got too much on your plate?
I've heard nuffin much from no one

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It's got so bloody quiet of late
have you all got too much on your plate?
I've heard nuffin much from no one
And no it's not much fun
Sitting by my pool, drinking your beer, mate

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The Pomms just got bashed at the Gabba

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The Pomms just got bashed at the Gabba
is the first line of a song made by Abba

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The Pomms just got bashed at the Gabba
is the first line of a song made by Abba
But don't you just think

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There'll come back from the brink

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-ZDS-

The pomms just got bashed at the gabba
is the first line of a song made by Abba
But don't you just think
They'll come back from the brink

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The pomms just got bashed at the gabba
is the first line of a song made by Abba
But don't you just think
They'll come back from the brink
Then get stuffed again at the wacca

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Ron's gonna give someone else a chance

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Ron's gonna give someone else a chance
For someone to get a word in advance

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Ron's gonna give someone else a chance
For someone to get a word in advance
On the 12th I will have a beer
At the cricket I will cheer
The Pomms beat us - NO CHANCE.

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The limerick rules of mine
were that you only completed one line
For most it's a breeze
carried ot with ease
but for some antipodean garage-dwellers the bl**dy concept is beyond them and they have to gloat because they have two guys who have a particular skill at making a ball do erratic things but have now retired and one of them is going to coach England spin bowlers so you wait mate. The tide will turn again :)

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Oops Ray
Will do better next time
Apologies

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"Will do better next time
Apologies"

That's exactly what Freddie Flintoff said.

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Hey you nobber Taylor, 1 line OK?

If you don't behave I'll set the England cricket team on you. They've all got new jobs apparently. As bouncers, Gotta do better in a nightclub than out on the pitch!!

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Ex-Gannites are getting awfully quiet

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Ex-Gannites are getting awfully quiet
Is it something to do with the nights

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Ex-Gannites are getting awfully quiet
Is it something to do with the nights
Is it something one said

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Ex-Gannites are getting awfully quiet
Is it something to do with the nights
Is it something one said
That altered the thread

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Ex-Gannites are getting awfully quiet
Is it something to do with the nights
Is it something one said
That altered the thread
At last we're getting it right


An ex-Siggie living in Oz

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Good one Ray, fill in the blanks

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Good one Ray, fill in the blanks
Whether it's bullets, rifles or tanks,

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Good one Ray, fill in the blanks
Whether it's bullets, rifles or tanks,
Sorry Tony, I'm slow

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Good one Ray, fill in the blanks
Whether it's bullets, rifles or tanks,
Sorry Tony, I'm slow
Don't apologise for having a go

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Good one Ray, fill in the blanks
Whether it's bullets, rifles or tanks,
Sorry Tony, I'm slow
Don't apologise for having a go
You know you do it with thanks.

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