My son got suspended today for cheating on his 6 weeks test...

He is a good kid and never gets into trouble and knows better than to cheat....

He had an A in the class before this test and all his grades were good...

I got a phone call saying he was suspended for cheating on his test that he was caught with a review sheet.

I was shocked and disappointed....

I just picked him up and he said he had the review sheet in his pocket and it fell out and when he tried to put it back the teacher saw him... he told me that he had it in his pocket because that was all he took into the class...it was still folded up when it fell out and was not opened.....

He said no one believes what he said about it and think he is lying...

I donto know what to believe now.... I am so sad and hurt from this ...he needs a scholarship for school and this is not going to look good on his record and now he failed his class.....

Can anyone give me any advice as to what I should do? If he was suspended unfairly or if he is lying to me....I have no clue what to believe....I know he would not lie to me and would own up to his mistake but that is not what he is doing...

I am so hurt right now....

Susan, If I had a nickel for every time my son got OSS......

The one thing you can never do is be overly defensive of your child and just listen closely to everyone. He made a bad decision having that in his pocket even though it was not his intention to cheat. You all have to meet together to discuss this. I assume he is going to a private school. The private school I went to had this happen occasionally, and no one was kicked out......

Teenagers are under soooooo much pressure these days. You just have to maintain a positive relationship with the school and teacher and he will learn from this mistake too.

Email: maria callison@hotmail.com

Susan..

I am soooo sorry for you..you have to be devastated..your heart is probably broken.. and I think you need a hug...

Only you know your son and what is the best way of dealing with him..and I know that you will do the right thing for him and for you too.

If you need or want to talk..I am here and so is everybody on RITA..

Love ya sis

Email: sbell48907@aol.com

thank you my heart is breaking and i feel so ashamed .... I have never been so disappointed in h im in my life....

corgi what is OOs?

If they failed him for the whole class because of one test....I would certainly challenge it with the school.

They should only give him a failing grade for the test, since there is no other cheating for that class that they are aware of.
The suspension should be his punishment not a fail for the entire class.

As for your son, lol, I have 3 boys and I find that they usually stretch the truth just a "wee" bit when they get caught.
Im not assuming he his lying, Im just saying that he knew it was in his pocket......and Im pretty sure it didnt fall out by itself....just be aware he doesnt want you to be disappointed in him either.

right tearose.... I am even more disappointed to think he would lie to me......that hurts even more....

thank you for sharing this it does help me to feel better.....I am in agony not knowing what the truth is...I know he does not want me to be hurt..him seeing me hurt is too hard for him....

Hi Joyful Susan,

I am so sorry that happened! It doesn't make sense why he would have a review sheet in his pocket when he got all A's in the class. That's like crib notes, isn't it?

Since I don't have any children of my own, I can't possibly give you any advice except to say that I will pray that the truth comes out. This is a really sticky situation, because if he IS telling the truth, he is going to be so hurt that his own mother didn't believe him, and if he's NOT telling the truth and you take his side, you're only reinforcing the bad behavior and he's do it again if he can get away with it. A good indicator whether he's telling the truth or not is if he's done this before.

Let's pray to the Lord for wisdom, and for the truth comes out.

Wise, words there Corgi!

Susan, I am praying and sending you hugs, too.
I might add that I would ask you son if he would pray with you about the situation. Might be a wonderful opportunity for you both (and telling).

Love,
alleluia

Oh he got a zero for the test which apparently gave him a failing grade for the class..it was like his final test for the semester...the big one.... he had a 90 before this test.

I agree with you that he knew it was in his pocket... and I said if it had fallen out you do not pick it up but raise your hand and tell the teacher that it happened... at least thats whaqt I would have done...I do nto think it fell out by its self....

A woman once told me (when I had my first son) that children were the greatest source of our joy and the greatest source of our heartache....

I remember thinking "you are sooo wrong! My son will never be the source of my heartache" LOLOLOLOL

Wellllllllll....16 years later I can say she knew a lil something I didnt then LOL

But we learn and grow and so do they. I spent too many days crying my eyes out for a season over him but I stayed before God's throne putting him in remembrance of his word and now things are better than I thought they would be.

He made a mistake, one of many he will make, but hold him up to the kids in the world right now and you will see God in him.

Susan,

First of all, whether your son is telling the truth or lying, he must not feel rejected or abandoned by you.

Secondly, he must understand that there is a consequence for his actions and/or reactions, whether good or bad.

Thirdly, this is a perfect time to build intimacy with him by praying with him over the circumstances he is presently facing. Ask him to pray out loud asking the Lord for wisdom in how to proceed. Don't preach at him. Just love him and ask the Lord Jesus to speak to him as he is quiet before the Lord. Teach him to listen for the Lord speaking to his heart after he has taken time to thank and praise the Lord for his goodness, provisions and protections in his life.

Lastly, be sure to not get ahead of God's timing. He has promised us to take what satan meant for evil and turn it into something good.

Praying for you

Love you Sis

Tom

(( alleluia))

youre right i came right to my room and cried and only talked about it in the car..he is being very quite right now..hgopefully he is crying out to God right now...I will get over this and be his mom and we will pray about this....

Lisa you are soooo right I am torn..not knowing what the truth is is crushing my heart.... I want to do what is best for him...and if that means have him scrub everything in the house for decepline because he cheated then I want to correct that problem..but if he is innocent then I want to support him....thank you for being so wise......

Joyful my dear Sis,

I second Tom's reply Sis.

Also see if you can talk to the school, just you alone and explain your sons side of the story. Maybe a way to see what the teachers have to say in private etc.

Love you sis

ybiC / Paul

"Out of school suspension". Our kids are not perfect, they will make mistakes, and they will learn from them. Since our love is unconditional they know we won't judge them for eternity. Yes, kids do lie and I am not saying your son is but, he could have left it in his pocket and not remembered to take it out before going to class. If he has a good track record at that school then they need to show him some leniency in the long run, the temporary suspension is just their rules. We all sign that contract at the beginning of the school year, including the child but, this is not like bringing a weapon or drugs to school.

So, its a time for all of y'all to reflect on what happened and make sure it never happens again.

Do NOT be ashamed!!!! Kids just do not always have that reasoning and are expected to do a lot more than when I was in High School.

My oldest son who never did anything wrong got arrested last summer for underage drinking and he still goes to college, has a good job...etc....he just made a dumb mistake and made it up with the courts, he feeds a group of homeless people every Tuesday. He actually cooks the food himself. So, since he has that to offer as a penance sort to speak, the court realizes he is not a loser. Of course he had to pay fees and, when kids have to pay money that gets their attention quickly.

Its very easy to turn bad to good with our kids.

Email: maria callison@hotmail.com

Tom thank you...we are very close and he knows I will never abandon him... I am not sure what he is thinking right now though but I think I am ready to go talk to him....

Corgi you made me laugh...thank you for making it real to me....

You have a good son too.... and you are right they are young and do not think sometimes of the consequesense...I am sure he realizes now that it hurts me....

thank you paul :) <<< look a smile... I think I wil lpray with him and talk to him... if he is lying to me then it willnot be good if I start to defend him.....

Joyful Susan, don't lose your joy over this. Every mother on earth has wished, wanted, hoped and believed that their child would not fail them, but they do. It is part of their learning process, and hopefully he will learn a valuable lesson from this.

I agree with TeaRose! It is too severe a penalty that he fail the entire class. I agree that it should be challenged as soon as possible. I have heard of various situations where schools back down, but it takes a parent to step in and fight it for the childs sake. You can make the "argument" as TeaRose brought up, that you agree to a suspension, but both suspension and failing the class is excessive. I would stay with it and go as high as necessary until they reverse failing the class.

Just pray before you go, let God take the hurt, forgive your son, and let God guide you as you go.

Hopefully as your son see's what this MAY cost him, and what it will cost you to confront this at the school, it will be a great lesson learned. God's blessings and best to you both!

Being suspended is bad, but it could have been even worse.

I used to work as a test examiner in an education center. When we tested military personnel, it was under the UMCJ (Universal Military Code of Justice). Military personnel caught with a cheat sheet face getting kicked out of the military, losing all retirement benefits, and going to Leavenworth for a while.

I also administered the GED (Test of General Educational Development) on a regular basis. People have gone to prison for cheating on the GED.

Your son needs to change how he prepares for tests. In my testing office, I would confiscate cell phones and pagers for the duration of the test. If they couldn't part with their cell phones, they could not take the test. Books and other personal items such as hats, coats, food, and water bottles could not be taken to the testing table. Test takers could not even use their own pens, pencils, or erasers. They could only use the pens, pencils, and erasers we provided. The testing room is a secure environment.

If I had caught someone with a "review sheet" I would have had no choice but to turn that person in. But, with all the warnings I gave and the close scrutiny everyone got throughout every test, both from me and from the proctors, the test takers didn't try.

Hi, I think the school should give him a different test, they would know if he cheated or not by how he does on a different test. Teachers are not perfect, I remember being told I was chewing gum and I wasn't. I would challenge the school. Maybe see if your son knows the material first.. Usually kids write on there hand or small piece of paper not the whole review sheet that needs to be taken out and unfold to look at... I would believe your son first...

sweet marie thank you...he is still saying he told me the truth and thisis hard because he has alwys owned up to things in the past... he has been honest with me before about some really hard things to tellme...so I am still torn about this.... he said he understand why they suyspended him because to them it looked like he waws cheating.....

he did ask them to give him anther test and he told him he knew everything on it and did not need to cheat.....

and you are right about they could be wrong...they were once before and it was with my daughter and they were really harsh with her...they expelled her... but I talked to the people who were in charge and found out the truth and he was surprised she was expelled because what happened did not deserve such a harsh punishment.... so this is why it is so hard and hurtful for me..

You can symbolicaly lift your son up before the
Lord.And give him back to the Lord.And ask the Lord
what to do.And ask the Lord for a swift answer.And to
please comfirm it.
PLUS all the above.
Hope this helps,
Star

We have prayed and he asked God to show he is not a cheater and asked for favor for a retest......

He told me the paper was a packet and it barely fit in his pocket.....he does not have a backpack and put itin his pocket...he does keep everythign in his pickets..I wash his things all the time....

I know he would tell me if he cheated....and he would have repented and gone off alone and asked God to forgive him..I have seen him do this before.... and this time he says he has nothing to repent of ......

We are beliving for favor and a retest...His pricipal hears from God and I know God can and will speak to hiim about this.....

we are going to eat and talk some more....

PRAISE THE LORD,
Star

The first person to see is the counselor. This person can investigate further, run interference,etc. Tell his side of the story, how he's never been in trouble, is a good kid, how he needs to get a scholarship, etc. Ask if there's any other alternative should he still not be believed. Get testimony from other teachers, scouts, church adults, pastor, community contacts, etc. should they still not believe his story. I tend to believe him. Sounds like something I could've easily done myself--just not put away my notes away securely enough.

Believe in him until proven to you otherwise and go to bat for him. Time enough to believe otherwise when proven to you. He needs you to believe in him right now and even more so later if proven true. The problem is it's Friday and nothing can be done until Monday. A L-o-o-n -g weekend to get through. You know your son best and should recognize signs of lieing, stretching truth, etc. From what you've said he's not into that behavior. You have a good relationship and trust. Don't let the devil toy with that. He'll remember this all his life and how you react, too,

Remember teachers can make mistakes, too. They're human and can misinterpret signals. A straight A student doesn't need to cheat on a test. Someone studying up to the last moment preparing for a test is typical of such a student who applies himself to the utmost. Everyone has the weekend to cool off and think more. Did you notice him studying hard, any concerns expressed as though worried about this test?

Present the case to the counselor and see how that goes first. The counselor could bring in the principal then or later. I'm assuming one or the other has been involved now already at this point. Remember, they're taking the teacher's word for this. You don't know the whole story yet. Were there witnesses? Has this been suspected previously? If so, why has there been no chance to change behavior through a counciling visit or contact of you prior? Etc. Could the teacher have over-reacted? What's the relationship with this teacher? If there's any doubt whatsoever, what other alternatives are there besides suspension? Now if this teacher has had any second thoughts and realizes a good kid could lose scholarship opportunity (which also looks good for the teacher!), then you may have room to manipulate and re-negotiate.

In the meantime, take this to the Lord to ask for discernment and how best to proceed from here. Remember also, Satan would love to do harm to a good kid, prevent scholarship opportunity and cause trouble in the family that could throw your son and you into a tailspin. Never forget the time we're in and how you all could be under attack through this means. That's why it's so important how he sees you responding and how this is handled. As well as involving Jesus. Allow your son to ask Him into this matter as well. May He witness Him battling for him!

Now this advice is coming from two educators, one with a principal/administrative background,and one with a middle school teaching background. It also comes with personal experience with one child. Our problem was truancy , not cheating, However, we,too,sought alternative punishment because this suspension would be just what was wanted in her case. Yours differs a bit. My husband became the counselor's best friend in a manner of speaking. Knew the counselor's phone number by heart. She was also failing a class needed for graduation. Needless to say this was embarassing to us as professional educators ourselves. Different school district though.

The final exam, she was going into it in failing status in algebra II. Dad took her under his tutorialship for a while but in the end it was up to her how this would turn out. Lots of nailbiting but whatever would be, would be. The phone rang afterwards. Imagine the dread leading to this call.....she aced the final exam!!

Now if she could do that, imagine what could've been done all along! Just a head shaker. So when daughter crossed the stage at graduation there was a little extra cheering going on and a number of family members congratulated her dad--said he should've gotten that diploma.

Give Jesus time to create miracles this weekend. As daughter was threatened with suspension (in play), we sought alternative punishment and got it. We, too, had to wait over a weekend. No one wanted her to fail and so accomodation was arranged. A scholarship is a different matter,but when you present your case--go into it willing to take some reprimand of some sort. If they see your willingness to support and stand by your son--realize this is a good kid who has made a mistake and shouldn't have to pay the ultimate price, but is willing to pay some sort of penalty; he's got a family willing to allow correction in some way but firmly standing with him to see this through to the end--a family commitment; then you may be able to re-negotiate terms. You won't know until you try. School officials aren't interested in destroying a kid's chance to graduate. Remember this is also a first time offense. Give this to Jesus. Leave it at the foot of the cross. Plead the Blood Of Jesus over this matter and ask Him to take care of this problem.

Remember Your Son is His son first! He will fight for Him, especially if he is innocent. You've just got to ask. He loves your son so much, you and your family. He will fight for you. Count on it. Allow your son to learn a valuable lesson either way. It's a learning experience. Encourage forgiveness if wronged. And if by chance you find out he isn't innocent--well, he's learning a valuable lesson. He's not the first to fall. Just help him up, time to recover, forgive himself, and move on. The worst will be facing his friends and that teacher later. My heart goes out to all of you. We'll be praying, too, from here. Our hearts go out to kids of today. A terrible time to grow up. So many tugs on them by this world and the enemy. Go with God and may His Blessings cover all of you as you deal with this problem. And remember, this,too, shall pass. Your son will go on to be all Jesus has made him to be. Soon this will be a past memory--a 'remember when' story. Maybe Jesus will come and you won't be going through this at all. Attitude is important to see you through this time. Smile--Jesus is coming soon.

--------

Just re-read your appeal. My spirit says your son is being truthful. You "know" your son. You confirm --no backpack-- carries things in his pocket--these notes were a packet(which the weight alone would cause to fall out of a shirt pocket). Remind the school officials of these habits. It may jog the teacher's memory, too. It breaks my heart to see him off alone but he's going to Jesus with this problem. You even said he's the type of kid who'd admit it and seek forgiveness. Deep down you know he's innocent. He's asked Jesus to prove he's innocent. Yeah and Amen. We can all join him in that. All the more reason to battle for him. He even commented he'd take another test and that he knew the material-no sign even of being worried about this test. I truly believe this is a satanic attack.

Thank You VC :) thatw was very encouraging especially coming from your experience...

the packet wasin his pant pocket BTW....

Also there is no counseler..it is a private christian school... and I have seen a few kids get expelled for what I believe were unfair reasons...

When I prayed with my son I prayed that the truth would come out either way.... and then he prayed and I asked if he needed to repend adn ask forgiveness and he said no and began to pray...I know he would not be able to pray if he was guilty.... his prayer was from the heart and awesome......

The teacher is new and she is from Brazil..her english is not that great and sometimes she will be teaching in english and switch over to porugeses without even realizing it... I have heard how she is a little different and is suspicious....and that was coming from another honor student who never speaks in class...lol...

I did tell my son because unfortuanely he was suspended he is still grounded and he has to listen to classical music all weekend..:) and do chores....and read his bib le....at least until the truth comes out ....

I think it is an attack too.... I have not been going to chruch like I should have been or like I used to before things happened with my daughter and everyone (all my friends) have been on me about not going....and this is just something else to make me feel ashamed and to keep me from going....

Thank you so much for the time it took to type that out...

and God bless everyone for coming to my rescue.... I was really a mess and needed friends....

Be ~huggs~ joyful susan,im praying for you and your son,shalom,shalom(peace)may Abba and Yeshua bring restoration,forgiveness and love to your family!!

Website: www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zqlnb_EtOW4

Thank you for your prayers YeshuasLady .. Bless you

Here is what is on my heart reading this thread. As another mother it will tugged at my heart and brought back lots of memories
.

I believe it is best that you believe him and trust his side of the story. Esp. since he hasn't given you any reason in the past to doubt. He sounds like a good boy.

Remember dear you are not like those other mothers who worry with out hope..You have a living Hope.

God will make this right for both of you. perfecting what concerns you. PS 138 :8 No weapon formed against him will prosper,Is 54 17

He will make a way where there seems to be no way and He will give your son favor.

Just hold him up to Jesus and You both will get through this perfectly fine.

When I feel like I or a family member have been treated unfairly or unjustly in someway. I always call out to God like Hagaar and I say" God You see. God You see. " Gen 16 . This helps me tremendously really more than I can say...that He does see and His eyes run to and fro looking to show Himself strong on behalf of those whose hearts are pure. 2 chron 16:9

Hang on to that. This just all came to my heart hope it helps. Expect a move...not because I said so but because He says so in His Word and He has such a tender heart for mothers.

Amen Mary Ann.. :) Thank you so much .... that is how I have gotten through al ot of trials in the passt..because I knew God knows..

He was just in here asking me if anything prophetic has happend today.... I havenot said anything to him in a few days about the rapture... I think it is Gods way of having him to trust me more... does that make sense... Thank You Jesus.... I see already what Jesus is up to with this..... my son although we do talk about the rapture together was getting tired of me talking about it and so I gave him a break..and look he came in here asking me if there have been any signs..and what is going on now.....God is good..I am sure if the devil had hindered our relationship that would not have happened...

Hey J/Susan - I'm sorry to hear what you and your son have been through today. It DOES sound like the devil is trying to harass you and your son. It also sounds like the teacher, being from another country and having trouble with the language, may be harder to communicate with and this may be part of the problem with your son in trying to explain. Just a thought.

It does sound like your son is a good boy and he is very close to you and knows the Lord and being aware of the times we are in presently, he is sensitive to what his Savior would think of him. I can certainly see if he hasn't been in any trouble before, has made good grades all along and he had his notes for studying just before going into class, stuffed them in his pocket, and they fell out. Did the teacher see him pick it up... I wonder what happened there and then?

Whatever happened, to fail him completely for that class when he had a 90 beforehand, I think is too severe. I agree with everyone above to meet with the counselor and principal. Praying for you and your son Susan as I know this is very upsetting for him and you. The Lord will get you through this and with His blessings because you both love Him.

Praying for your peace in all of this for you both.

Oh That is so sweet. That just really blessed me,

I can almost picture your sweet boy asking if anything prophetic happened today. It really brought tears to my eyes. That is a good son.

He knows what is important.

After a rough time he comes to his mom for a good word. God Bless him.

thank you shirley..he said the paper feel out onto the desk and he reached over and was putting it back in his pocket and she saw him doing that and asked about it...

he failed the class because this grade was 1/3 of the over all grade...he had a 100 for homework and 80 for tests this morning ( I checked out his grades for every class this morning to see where he stood at that time) and the zero brought the over all score down to a 60..knocking him off the honor roll...God will turn it around for His glory I knwo He will....

Oh and also when I have a test we are all sitting in the halls with our review sheets until the teacher opens the door and we are putting the sheets away when the tests are starting to be passed out..I remember one time looking down and mine was on the floor where it could be seen...I paniced... and turned it over....that was in the middle of the test too..

I am so glad that blessed you Mary ann..... you have blessed me as well

everyne has adn I pray for special blessings to be upon all of yall and for the Holy Spirit fill you with the oil of gladness...and that alal your needs will be meet until we are all taken home....which is soon :)

I'm so glad you went from "not so Joyful Susan" to "Joyful Susan".

I happy you're feeling better, sis!!

from a teacher :
there is no reason for you to feel ashamed . Students very often take review notes to school right before a big test ....just because he had it in his pocket and it fell out , does not mean he was cheating at all . They ASSUMED he was cheating . Did they look through all the pockets of the other students to see their review notes ? they were lucky that they also did not fall out ....
I would pray with him and talk to him and if he insist he was not cheating , get counsel !!! The TEACHER was harsh in my opinion . She assumed A LOT !
this could injure his educational position and it may need legal help !
bb...blessings , prayers going up for you !

Thank you Lisa.. I am happy you are happy too :)

Bonbell..thank you .. I pray every time I woke up last night and then I started thinking that I need then to give me more details and I should ask if they actually saw him looking at the paper (which she did not she unfolded it to see what it was) and then to say to them so did my son get suspended for cheating or for a review sheet that feel out of his pocket? and I want to know if they saw him cheating (looking at the paper) or did they just assume he was cheating because he had the paper... I feel bad I did not replace his backpack now... the zipper ripped when they were doing a canned food drive and he was going through the neighborhood and used his backpack to carry the cans.....

It is a judgemental religious spirit I deal with in this school..... I have had to deal with it many times..I am just about the only single parent there and I usually do not speak up.... and it has been hard for my kids being labled from a divorced family... I did not fight for my daughter and I learned that you have to fight for your kids....

I still have a problem getting out of my mind a look someone gave my son at church one day.... she called him out in the parking lot... and I wasin the car ...he was about to get in..and was questioning hiim about a phone call her daughter got.... he spent the night with some other boys and the oldest got his cell and called her... and it came up with my sons name on it (she had his number in her phone) so they thought it was him.... he explained what happened but the whole entire time she gave him the awful hateful look....when he got in I asked what that was about and he told me and I said why was she looking at you like that and he said she always looks at me like that...it broke my heart and i wanted to go to her and let her know just how she looked to me....but i blew it off.... I would never treat her daughter this way and myt son and her daughter have been friends since they were in preschool....this is one reason I am not at church as much... I am tired of it.... the Holy Spirit flows in a powerful way .. He is there and it is awesome and I have many friends who are actully my family there (who deal with the samething and know how it is) but I can be very sensitive about all of this and would rather retreat than to deal with it.....

I also have dealt with shame and embarrassment all my life and guilt...because of abuse as a child.. what would not bother someone else tears me up.....

I just want Jesus to come and take us to heaven so we will not have to deal with this any more...

I realize I am not perfect either... and i have made lots of mistakes in my life... my son is pretty good he can let it roll off his back... but it deaper for me...

thank you to anyone who was listening to al lof this...yall are the bestest......

You've made some interesting comments about this teacher and in dealing with other students that cause me to wonder aloud on--to keep in the back of your mind to re-examine later. Is there a principal then to contact? Who did the actual suspension?

Is a Pastor involved with the Church school? One who would stand with you in talking to the teacher? Are there any male relatives/ dear friends that would go with you to confront this teacher? Like it or not that male image is still respected as an authority figure--especially with a teen son. I get the impression there are those in your church that are judging you and the kids because Dad isn't there. So wrong--if so. Not reflective of Jesus at all. In any case your son has nothing to say about that; can't be blamed. I'm sorry you're going through all this. Is prejudice involved then?

This teacher is from Brazil. Is she newly arrived from there? Has she transferred from a local public school or arrived recently from another city/state? Culture-wise, how acclimatized is she? Could this be part of the problem ? The suspicious nature, you mentioned.It doesn't sound like she's been around enough to get much impression there yet.

I don't know much about Brazilian culture but do know one man who was a fantastic English as a second language teacher whom everyone adored. So maybe that's not an issue and maybe it's playing a part. You'll have to see what impressions you get.

Radical feminists have invaded the educational domain--especially in the areas of test scores and controlling those. They want to compare boy's scores with girl's scores which isn't fair to our boys. They develop differently amd come into their own more in high school. I've seen damage done that destroys boys fragile egos at critical times causing them and their families grief--stating the child needs all this help and never will be able to catch up, etc. The boys believe they can't do anything right to please the teacher and will never amount to anything. Then they get to high school and blow those teachers predictions out of the water, proving them wrong. In the meantime fragile egoes were damaged. I've heard comments like," I/We don't expect him to pass the state standards." Heck, he's been set up to fail with comments like that. All the kid hears is his teacher doesn't believe in him! He doesn't know what a state standard is.

In your son's case, could she be subconciously looking to find fault because he is an honors student and needs that scholarship to go to college even more so due to your circumstances? Don't see her with that attitude in mind, but if things don't go well, then think it over. Did you pick up any clues to think about? You mentioned another honor student having difficulty ,too. Is this student a male ,also? Are they good friends?

This outcome based education prevalent today as with the No Child Left Behind is nothing but test after test--leaves no time for teaching unless coaching for the next test. It's an awful thing to do to children, teachers and parents. Too much pressure to perform with an emphasis more on what the student hasn't yet learned, rather than praise for what he has learned. I mention this because this time of year teachers are beside themselves testing and recording data for the powers that be which then judge them in return. This teacher could be overwhelmed right now. I don't know about private schools, but the possibility is that by Friday, she was pushed over the edge with all the demands expected of her. In that case she'll need forgiving herself, but may not admit it. Just another possible piece to the puzzle to keep in the back of your mind..This may also be a good way to approach her recognizing the time of the year that's so demanding on teachers and approaching her in an understanding manner to get past a defensive wall she could errect.

Latch on to Jesus hand . We're to be victorious overcomers. He'll see you through. I, too, am glad to see you bouncing back. It's interesting to note the agreement of your son's innocence here. The loving messages of support and love offered to see you through this--to lift you both high to Jesus as you move on. You've already won in the courts of heaven!! VC

Do you need to attend church here to go to this school? You aren't getting what you need here, especially your children. This religious intolerance seems to be at the heart of this. See what you think after your visit. If we're still here after school is out, consider visiting some other churches over summer. Just to compare ,note differences.

I understand what you are saying VC. There was a teacher at a small parochial school that my son attended, my son who made straight As and never did anything wrong, she complained that Richard smiled too much. So, she immediately thought he was up to no good and even wrote comments on his report card that were unfounded. I told her....M'am if my child is happy....he is allowed to smile!!!!!!! She of course was eventually let go.

You will run into some tough teacher battles that is for sure and I do not miss those days!!!!!!!!!!! I saw them in both Public and Private schools with my kids and, whats amazing is that Richard blossomed in a Public school while Michael.............just needed to be done with school and is almost there Amen.

Email: maria callison@hotmail.com